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Clare, Solicitor
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 35051
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practice since 1985 with a wide general experience.
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Our 23 year old daughter lives with her 35 year old partner

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Our 23 year old daughter lives with her 35 year old partner and our 20 month old granddaughter in a 2 bedroom flat - one leased from an affordable housing group. She and their daughter need to leave – for reasons given below - but her partner says that as his name is ***** ***** the lease – she has to get out with the baby.
Her partner is an ex drug dealer who has now been working full time for some 6 months, until then our daughter earned the money and he was on benefits. He has been physically abusive very many times but now is mentally abusive – all this is in front of the baby – as he now spends a lot of his money on drink and drugs.
In the flat; 95% of the furniture has been bought by us for them as well nearly all our granddaughter’s her toys, clothes and a lot o for her food.
It seems wrong that our daughter has to move out into a refuge – we cannot take her in but could possibly look after our granddaughter for a few months.
My wife and I have no idea what to do and what can be done but it seems wrong to take the baby out of where she has all her belongings. Is there anything my daughter can do here (she’s not working at the moment because of major depression). Many thanks, John
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
When was the last incidence of direct Domestic Violence?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Clare, hello, before I get too deep into this question, would you please confirm something about costs.
I only want one question answered and do not want, nor can afford, to start any monthly deductions.
I'm assuming that the £36 deduction from my card is for this one off question request. Can you please confirm that this is true before we continue.
Many thanks,

I will ask customer services to check that you have not inadvertently signed up for anything else
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Clare, Firstly many thanks for sorting out the monthly DD paying issue, very much appreciated.

In terms of physical violence - a lot around March and April this year but when the police were called our daughter denied it (even though my wife was there and witnessed it) so nothing they could do. Social Services did come with some anger management courses and monitoring. After that it turned to mental abuse with occasional physical the last being last week when he knocked down and dragged out of the flat and locked the door.

The dreadful thing is that all this is witnessed by our 20 month old granddaughter.

Now she has told him she wants to leave him but all is being offered is a refuge when all her clothes, furniture that we've bought plus all the baby's clothes and toys (again bought by us) are there.

I suppose the real question is what rights has she got to stay there and get him out (although she is a secondary name on the lease.

I hope this helps,

With best regards,


When last week did that happen - and dis your daughter report it?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Clare, hello,

Sorry fro delay in replying; I'm not sure of the date but certainly our daughter didn't report it and told us yesterday that it was "her fault".

I've certainly seen her provoking him for no good reason and wonder if she is getting a sort of battered wife syndrome.

We have no real idea if she really wants to part from this guy so our concern if our granddaughter and want to be prepared for the worst.

I'm not sure that this helps and thank you.

With kind regards,


Unfortunately only your daughter can make the decision to leave - although she may need support in reaching that point
You can find out more here
If she does decide to do so then whilst a Refuge may be a temporary place of safety she can if she wishes apply to the court for an Order allowing her to return to the property and live there and force him to leave
I hope that this is of assistance - please ask if you need further details
Clare and other Law Specialists are ready to help you