How JustAnswer Works:
  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site. Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.
Ask Jo C. Your Own Question
Jo C.
Jo C., Barrister
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 71048
Experience:  Over 5 years in practice
Type Your Law Question Here...
Jo C. is online now

I have a situation my girlfriend is a foster carer and I attack

This answer was rated:

I have a situation my girlfriend is a foster carer and I attack her had a black out dont remember doing it and she then retracted her statement do a clars law check on me it was clean I got a simple caution from the police but social services want us to now end our relationship can anybody help we both feel this is a very harsh decision they is a complaints form I could fill out . I just want a fair hearing , it was decided without myself and girlfriend present is there a solution would like some light at the end of the tunnel . I have a great job to and I took Benadryl one a day relief tablets when we went out for a drink together with friends . I looked up that there is side affects aggressive is one of them so could that have caused my unusual behaviour .
Thank you for your question. My name is ***** ***** I will try to help with this.
What would you like to know about this please?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Well my girlfriends agency NFA and social services held meeting without both of us they also done a p4 check on me to .i am wondering if we have any chance of having a fair hearing regarding this whole situation
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Do we have a chance of overturning the decision made by the social services and my girlfriends agency nfa please reply I have paid £56 pounds already thank you .

Well, you are perfectly free to complain.
If you mean that you hope to change their mind about this then you have to be realistic I'm afraid. Unfortunately it is not likely.
It isn't your fault. If she wanted to avoid this the thing to do would have been not to get the police involved in your domestic rows. We all have these rows. We don't all invite the police out to play at them. The reason we don't all have these cautions is that most of us live with adults who don't see personal disputes as a proper subject for the police.
Nevertheless, social services will say that they are paying her to look after vulnerable children. I have to say that I don't agree with that either. Most teenagers in care have their wits about them, don't you worry. They know their rights. It is their duties they struggle with in my experience. That is not a view social services will share. They will say that they are placing juveniles in her care and they are not willing to do so while she has a relationship with a person with your history. In fairness, they may agree personally but be unwilling to take the risk.
They cannot force you to split up. What they can do is stop placing children there though.
I am sorry but you have to be realistic and that will be their view of this.
Can I clarify anything for you?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Yes so you are saying that we dont have a chance then this is the only thing I have on my record no previous got a clean record apart from this simple caution surely they must give us a fair hearing thats all.

Realistically, if the caution is for a domestic related incident they are not going to place a child with her.
It is not your fault. That is what happens when people get the police involved in personal disputes. You cannot control the consequences.
Jo C. and 3 other Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

This happened outside on a night out the foster kids were never in danger my girlfriend phoned the police when she got home on the saturday night then I got arrested on the 14th november 2014 interviewed me then gave me a simple caution with no previous records I feel like a hardened criminal .

Yes, I understand.
I would never have recommended accepting a caution as she would not likely have given evidence not that it would have made any difference to social services decision.
The fact that they were not at risk on this occasion makes no difference.
In fairness, you can imagine the criticism that social services would face if there was a serious incident and they had placed a child with a person with a record for domestic assault. They are not going to take the risk.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

I do not live with my girlfriend and would gladly stay away from the house we just want to stay together as in a relationship without being told otherwise

You can stay in a relationship.
It will just mean that she cannot foster children.
I am sorry but even if you stay away they will still have an issue if she remains with you.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

So theres no chance of a relationship if my girlfriend stays in fostering then . On the day I took benadryl one a day relief tablets and then I drank alcohol and since I have seen my doctor and he told me that it has side affects and one of them is aggression . I have never done anything like this before .

Not if she wants to stay in fostering.
I do understand but the plain fact remains that she knew this would be an issue and she choose to make a report. She has to face the consequences I'm afraid.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Ok well thank you for your answers will take them on board but we will continue this fight until we can hopefully resolve this situation . Thanks again have a merry christmas and a happy new year just hope my new year is a happy one.

No problem.
All the best.