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Jo C.
Jo C., Barrister
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 71051
Experience:  Over 5 years in practice
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, i was raped by my brother in law 16yrs ago, in my own home

Customer Question

, i was raped by my brother in law 16yrs ago, in my own home in my own bed.Yes we had been drinking, but you should feel safe with family. I had too much and was put to bed to sleep it off. When it happened, he told my husband and sister, he was checking on the children. They went outside fresh air, she was feeling ill. My 2 nieces aged 8 & 10 and my children 7 & 9 were in the next bedroom. After he said, "this never happened susan, don't say anything to anyone, can you hear me?" I nodded. To cut a very long story short, I reported it to the police, taped him confessing to everything, the CPS were confident of a conviction. ( which I wasn't told at the time) I was put off going through with it by the police, as they told me it would be very traumatic concerned. My daughter aged 7 told me she used to have bad dreams when her uncle put her to bed!!!. So abuse may have been an issue. They told me she would be interviewed. All through this time, my husband and I were not speaking, the atmosphere in our once happy, lovely home was shattered. I was a wreck, not sleeping, crying most of the time. Mum was ill. And the police told me it would probably take months, maybe years to come to trial. sake of all, i decided to stop the proceedings. I wish I hadn't. I am still on medication and PTSD. And am haunted by it all even now. I asked the police 5 years ago, if i could re open the case, but they told me that as they had told him that no further action would be taken. I need closure, i need him to suffer as i have done all these years, he decided to do that to me, I am still suffering. I look at their photos on FB they all look so happy, and I am left feeling betrayed and so cannot get what happened out of my mind.
I want to sue him or something the hurt he has caused me and my husband.
I still have his taped confession, is there anything I can do?
thank you, sue
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Law
Expert:  Jo C. replied 3 years ago.
Thank you question. My name is ***** ***** I will try to help with this.
I am sorry but if the matter was formally NFAed because you withdrew then it cannot be revived now. There is no way around it. A formal NFAED brings an end to the matter.
It is possible to complain to the IPCC but the police will say they were complying with their duty to warn you of the negative effects of pursuing this.
Sorry but I can only give you truthful information.
Can I clarify anything
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

, thank you reply. I cannot hide the fact, that I am disappointed.

What does NFAed stand for??

You mention a formal NFAed, what form does this take?

I think this is bad practice by the police, after a traumatic event such as this, one is very confused and vulnerable. On the one hand wanting justice self and wanting to proceed and on the other, wanting to protect your family and children from the horrors of it all. No advice or proper support is given.

Re: making a complaint, would I simply write to the IPCC?

Thank you, sue

Expert:  Jo C. replied 3 years ago.
No further action.
You can complain to the IPCC but I'm afraid the defence will be that they were warning you of the adverse outcomes that you may face which they are under a duty to do. I am really sorry but I cannot agree this is bad practice. It would be wholly unethical of the police not to tell witnesses what may happen if they pursue a prosecution. It flies in the face of all the guidelines of putting witnesses first.