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Jo C.
Jo C., Barrister
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 71031
Experience:  Over 5 years in practice
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I am very sorry to disturb you. My partener's ex is a Cop

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Hi I am very sorry to disturb you. My partener's ex is a Cop at the MPS London.
He has send me a threatening abusing letter at work without addressing it to me. The letter was therefore opened and read by a member of staff before being delivered to me. The letter contained unwanted informations, insults, threats which caused me hemabarassment at work and caused alarmed and distressed. I decided not to answer the letter. He was asked by my partner on my behalf not to contact me ever again. He then tried to contact me on FB. And I blocked him. He then tried to contact me on LinkedIN and I blocked him. At that point he was asked again not to contact me or we would have had the only option to file a formal complaint with the MPS. He wrote to me at work again, this time faking to be another person. However he contacted my partner to confess he wrote an anonymous letter addressed to me. We decided therefore to write him a letter asking not to attempt any contact with me again and to contact my partnered only via email otherwise we would have no other choice than to contact the police directly. After receiving the letter this policeman contacted my partner via phone telling all sorts of insults and that if he should ever meet me 'I would go to prison for what I would do to him'.
I am scared, worried and alarmed.
Is there anything do you think I should do?
Thank you for your support
Thank you for your question. My name is ***** ***** I will try to help with this.
I presume he has no interest in you? Save for your relationship with her. He didn't know you before?
That begs the question of how did he get your contact details? I presume you didn't give them to him?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Hi thank you.
He contacted me with letters, on LinkedIn and Facebook knowing my name. The letter were addressed to my work place.
I never gave my contacts to him of course.
I met him once previously during a dinner. But that was all.
This was before they split up and before I started a relationship with my partner
No, but how did he find out you were involved with her at all?
Do you know?
It is just that if he is being incited by another person than yourself it would affect what action can be taken.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
He unlocked my partener's iPad and logged in into Skype and read our conversation.
At that point they were not in a relationship for 9 month and they were still sharing the house.
You need to progress fairly carefully with this. I understand what you have been told about this situation but you don't want any nasty shocks in court about the reality.
I wouldn't worry about what he is supposed to have said to her. You weren't party to that conversation and cannot really be sure it is reliable. Those threats are completely hollow anyway.
You need to worry about you. You are the most important person here. None of this is of your creation. You are just a victim of their relationship and it is not for you to sort out.
He has no legitimate reason to be contacting you. You are not involved with him. You are not contacting him. If this person is a police officer then it is quite unlikely that he will not be concerned about being reported for harassment unless, of course, he says there is legitimate reason to act against you like the investigation of crime or something similar to that.
Anonymous letters are always very difficult. By definition they are anonymous. I wouldn't make any allegations arising from that unless it is clear from the face of the correspondence that it can only have been from him or he has confessed within your actual earshot.
You can make a report if he carries on. You can also seek a civil injunction to prevent him contacting you.
Obviously he is unlikely to be happy about a report which is why you need to be very careful about what you do report and to ensure that it is no more than the absolute minimum that you yourself can prove.
If you are concerned about reprisals from him though, if you have made a truthful and accurate report without any embellishment yourself or added a contribution from others then there is nothing he can do to you.
Do take care of yourself. This entire situation is not your problem and unfortunately you are caught in the cross fire.
Can I clarify anything for you?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Thank you very much
No problem.
Do not get involved in this. This is their relationship for them to sort out. You just leave them to it.
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