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Jo C.
Jo C., Barrister
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 71132
Experience:  Over 5 years in practice
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Alex Watts has replied to my question with a further question

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Alex Watts has replied to my question with a further question but has since gone offline. Are there any other solicitors available online that can help please?
Thank you for your question. My name is ***** ***** I will try to help with this.
What can I do for you?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Me: I am at my wits end dealing with a guy who has threatened to tell my employer all about the sexual activities we have discussed with each other and some that we have done on the two occasions we have met. The activities we have done are not wrong but are deeply embarrassing. What can I do if this guy does contact my employer? I don't think there is a lot I can do to stop him from telling them if he really wants to though.

Alex Watts:

Hello my name is ***** ***** I will help you with this.

What does the guy want in return for his silence please?


It is unclear what he wants exactly. I think it is to continue meeting with me and continue our relationship, however he hasn't explicitly said that. He makes out that he will 'report' me to my employer. We didn't speak for a few months then he texted me saying sorry. I have continued texting him back to keep him as happy as I can as I don't want him to speak to my employer but I have kept stalling him about meeting again. Occasionally he will then reply with something along the lines of 'our fun is over, we are never meeting again' but then gets back in touch and apologises. I'm scared that if I ignore the messages, he will speak to my employer.

It says 'the expert is: offline' - is someone able to get back to my query now if possible please?

That isn't blackmail then. He isn't making a money demand.
It is possible that his messages amount to harassment although you are responding so probably not. There may be offences under the communication legislation that would apply.
There is a risk he could tell your employer. I do not know why he thinks your employer would be interested in your personal life but there you have it.
If he does and he only tells the truth and doesn't send compromising images then that is not unlawful I'm afraid.
Ultimately there isn't a way of preventing him from telling the truth. If he says something untrue then that would amount to defamation.
If you want him to stop contacting you then just ignore him until he responds at least twice and then send him a text telling him to stop making further contact and any attempt to do so will be considered harassment. If he does then you can always get the police to give him a harassment warning.
Sorry if that is bad news.
Can I clarify anything for you?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Thanks for your reply.

What does this mean please? "There may be offences under the communication legislation that would apply."

I am responding to him because I'm scared of what will happen if I don't respond. Does that not count at all?

If he were to contact my employer after I sent that text to him that you suggest, would this also count as harassment?

No. It is not harassment because you are responding.
Contacting your employer could constitute contacting you indirectly but there would need to be more than one instance of contact to make out harassment. Harassments are about courses of conduct so there needs to be more than one incident.
Obscene messages are usually covered by the Communications but you seem to be describing generally unwelcome ones and the problem is that you are responding. That type of thing doesn't become an offence until you tell somebody to stop ideally expressly but at least implicitly.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Ok thanks. I have blocked him on my phone at the moment. Would it be a good idea to unblock and have him text a couple of times and then send that message asking to stop?

Blocking him does stop him contacting you which is your ultimate goal.
One option is to unblock him, let him send one more text and then text back telling him to stop. He may send a protest text asking why and it isn't really fair to include that in the vexatious conduct but if he carries on thereafter then that is harassment.
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