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Clare, Solicitor
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 34895
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practice since 1985 with a wide general experience.
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Clare, thanks help so far. I approached my ex-wife &

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Hi Clare , thanks for your help so far. I approached my ex-wife & suggested that if I continued to pay her directly , whilst my son is at university , then she should pay his rent & monthly allowance , Ie not me having to pay him his rent & a monthly allowance in addition to the sums I pay her ( which is currently £1367 per month )
She reacted pretty badly to this - pls see belowThis is her response to me :Hi GaryThanks for your email. I must confess to being slightly alarmed by your note and have consulted with the solicitor who drafted the document. By any interpretation, it is clear that the maintenance payments you give me for Hugo continue through to the end of his time at university - tertiary education.
Nothing has happened to warrant a change in the consent order. I will continue to provide a home for Hugo; I will continue to provide as much funding for his needs as is reasonable and necessary. I will of course, substantially increase his allowance when he goes up to university and, as I have done for many years, pay for all his incidental needs - which are significant.If any of this is unclear, please give me a call.Tess "
So the questions I have are as follows :* the consent order states tertiary so this means including university, so I understand that this means I have to continue to pay.* it only apertains to the first 3 year degree course and not a secondary course, eg MA, PHD ?* if I went back to court & asked for the consent order to be amended so that I could pay my son direct, then is there any risk they might actually increase my monthly payments ? Should I apply to the CMS to negate the court order - or is that a bad approach ?The sad fact is that we have lived in relative harmony over the past 14 years , my ex-wife remarried 13 years ago and my son happily moves from house to house .
I am of course more than happy to fund key elements of my son's university education , but now he is an adult and away from home for most of the year it does feel as though I am paying twice ?
I am not seeking any " life advice " here but I am simply being unreasonable ?
Many thanks

Thank you for the question

May I ask - why are YOU expected to pay his rent and allowance?

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
That seems to be my ex - wife's view . I had already told my son that I would pay his rent at university and give him a small monthly allowance , but that was when I assumed that my maintenance payments were going to cease once he was 18 . Hence my dilemma , ie it appears my ex- wife wants me to continue to pay the maintenance plus fund my son etc

You are entitled to write back that your maintenance payments are meant to cover all your sons expenses other than any "extras" you chose to pay for.

On that basis she needs to use the maintenance to pay for his rent and allowance - and it is for you to "top that up" directly with your son if you decide to do so.

The choice is the hers.

You can pay your son directly - and then you are both responsible for your young adult child - or you can pay your maintenance to your ex and she can sort his finances out.

That is the approach that the court will take.

to answer your specific questions


2. It does not say so but it is implied

3. Unlikely - and approaching CMS at this point would not be wise

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Thanks Clare
Just one more question pls
If my ex - wife went back to Court would you forsee any grounds wherein the Court could increase the maintenance payments ?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Sorry Clare , but could you kindly just let me know if my last question, eg if my ex-wife reapplied to the court to increase the payments , that there would be any chance they might do this ?

Highly unlikely - and the payments would then be made payable to your son!

Clare and other Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Hi Clare
Thanks for your note .
I am seeing my ex-wife and I am going to walk her through your advice . If I need any more help in this case , then I will certainly engage your service
Warm regards

You are most welcome I hope all goes well