There is no doubt about it, the neighbour is harassing you. Not directly necessarily although sometimes directly, but also through a third party.
Because of the number of complaints made to the police, none of which have been upheld, there is no reason why you should not refer the matter to the police to get her warmed under the Protection from Harassment Act. Don’t be fobbed off by the police that this is a civil matter, this is harassment and it is a criminal offence. Sometimes, the police take the line of least resistance by just saying that it’s a civil matter. It is a civil matter but it is also criminal.
She cannot simply complain through a third party constantly or even complain to you constantly. She either has to issue proceedings or shut up and leave you alone.
You are absolutely right that the best course of action initially at least is to get a solicitor to write and say “either take the action you are threatening or leave my clients alone”, but to go on to say that if there are any further incidents or complaints, you will immediately apply to court for an injunction to prevent her harassing you further and not only will you apply for the injunction, you will ask the court to award the court costs and the solicitors costs against her.
The solicitor will know exactly what to do. If it doesn’t stop after the letter is sent, they make the application to court for the injunction.
Can I clarify anything for you?
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We can still exchange emails. Best wishes.