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Ask Clare Your Own Question
Clare, Solicitor
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 35310
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practice since 1985 with a wide general experience.
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My husband and I divorced 11 years ago and have one son

Customer Question

My husband and I divorced 11 years ago and have one son things have been amicable until he moved to London and remarried . He sees his son once a fortnight and is now demanding I drive from Shropshire to Oxford on a Friday to drop Jacob iff and dive back to Oxford on Sunday and back to collect him. I work full time and am a very nervous driver and cannot do this he is threatening me with court where do I stand ? Thank you
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Law
Expert:  Clare replied 1 year ago.

Thank you for your question

My name is Clare

I shall do my best to help you but I need some further information first

How old is your son - and have you always lived in Shropshire?

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
My son is 14 and we have always lived in shropshire
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I also have a lease car with the NHS and will be financially penalised if I exceed my private miles ,of which travelling to Oxford will result in . Thank you
Expert:  Clare replied 1 year ago.

When did your ex move to London - how was the travelling organised prior to this?

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
He had a house in Birmingham which we has just sold and so would collect Jacob from there and return him home on a Friday communicating between his home in Birmingham and London. He has had his second home in London for approximately 5 years
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
we never argued about the arrangements until he sold his home in Birmingham to move solely to London .it is now he wants me to drive to Oxford Friday's and Sunday's
Expert:  Clare replied 1 year ago.

Could you make Birmingham once a fortnight (just one way)

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
He is now stating its Oxford I have to go to. He says Birmingham is no longer an option as he lives in London . He states it is my responsibility but he has no responsibility the whole 2 weeks in between when I care for Jacob.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
If it went to court Clare could a judge make me drive to Oxford even though I will be financially penalised by my lease car company and I have no confidence or experience driving on the motorway and as A nurse I have to work some time over the weekends
Expert:  Clare replied 1 year ago.

My apologies for the delay

It is NOT your responsibility to cope with the change of arrangements caused by his move.

The distance involved means that it is not totally unreasonable for him to ask you to take some part in the travel arrangements - but offering to go to Birmingham on either the Friday or the Sunday would be a reasonable offer in the circumstances.

If he applies to the court they will look for a solution that is reasonable - and the reasons you have given for not driving to Oxford are clear and understandable.

The only other thing I would look at would be the possibility of using a train/car option with you taking him to the station.

Please ask if your need further details

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Many thanks do you feel at 14 it is safe for Jacob to travel on the train alone ?
Expert:  Clare replied 1 year ago.

That of course depends on the route and the child - a straight route with no changes for a responsible child and not at night could be reasonable