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plclegal, Barrister
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 6364
Experience:  Barrister at law
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I am going to go through mediation, recently separated from

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I am going to go through mediation, recently separated from my wife (married for 4 years). We have a baby of 6 weeks old but she doesn't want to live with me anymore. She worked only first 2 months but did not contribute to running the house and stopped working in the last 2 years (despite discussing several times she did not work) as she spent most of her time in Manchester (we moved to Swansea, Wales as I got a job here).
I have got some cash in my account (current account around 4k and ISA 4k). I have car on hire purchase ( 5k in debt and value is around 12k now). She will also be getting 5k from me due to religious marriage (Haq Mehr for Nikkah). I also pay pension 9.3% of my salary.I wanted to get advice in terms of what and how should I be negotiating at Mediation regarding assets/money matters etc. I am clear about child maintenance ( net income [gross - pension] via gov calculator. Is there any way I could not pay half of my car/ISA (as i will be paying 5k for Haq Mahr (religious term) anyway?
Customer: replied 7 months ago.
She worked first 2 years of marriage*

Hello, my name is ***** ***** I’ll do my best to assist you today.

Please bear in mind as this is an email service and not live chat I may not respond immediately.

I'm reviewing your question and will revert back to you shortly.

Customer: replied 7 months ago.
Its been very stressful lately. I am all ok to pay child maintenance. She might come after spousal maintenance/accomodation but she left the house which was under joint tenancy and now she is going to get her name removed from the contract. I want to know my legal rights and the best way to run negotiations at mediation. She is very keen to get divorced straight away and accepted to file for divorce on unreasonable behaviour and she wont have any issue on that ( it might change once she starts contacting different soilcitors).

OK. Your savings and ISA - when were these acquired?

Where is the money coming from for the Haq Mahr?

How much do you earn, approximately?

Is she planning on not returning to work, for the foreseeable future?

How long have you been paying into your pension?

Customer: replied 7 months ago.
ISA - about 2 years ago. I dont have a saving account as such. I have money in my current account.Haq Mehr money is going to be either from ISA or from 4k in my current account.As per HMRC - 45k plus 3k ( it might change after december going upto max 55k)Pension 9.3% every month since Aug 2017.
Customer: replied 7 months ago.
She told me she has enrolled in accounting and she is going to complete her degree as ACCA.

And just to double check - do you own any property?

Are either of you coming into any money through inheritance in the near future?

Customer: replied 7 months ago.
We dont have any properties and no money coming from inheritance.

Thanks for confirming.

OK, in terms of the savings/ ISA - she is getting more than half of this as the Haq Mehr.

Child maintenance you have covered.

Spousal maintenance is unlikely to be due, as you would not be classed as a 'high' earner. If there was a claim for spousal maintenance, it should be time limited as her earning potential is going to be realised soon.

You have paid into your pension for a short amount of time, so there won't be a lot in the pension pot - a claim agains this asset is not really going to come to much here. But you may wish to consider offering slightly more in cash now to prevent a claim on the pension to keep things more straightforward.

The car is not really an asset as it is on finance - and by the time the debt is cleared it is not clear what the car will be worth. I would suggest that you should keep this.

I hope this assists?

Hello - did you receive my reply?

Can I assist you further with your question?

Kind regards,



I didn’t receive confirmation that you received my response to your question.

Was there anything that needed clarifying at all?

Kind regards,


Customer: replied 7 months ago.
Hi Peter
Thanks for your reply. Your reply was concise but still i am not sure what to bring on the table for negotiation. I planned to negotiate child maintenance but realised CSA would be better option. Looking at the accounts it seems i have earned £56k last year therefore i will be paying alot towards that.Do u think its a good time to file for divorce too after maintenance is agreed? Or should i wait. I am planning on filing divorce on the basis of unreasonable behaviour ; not contributing financially etc. Do u think its reasonable?
Will she ask me to provide accomodation too? If yes should i be paying towards that too,?

Thanks for confirming receipt.

The CMS guideline are the benchmark for child maintenance - it's not a negotiation point really.

You can file for divorce at any time - financial issues can be agreed through mediation alongside the divorce process.

You can file on the basis of unreasonable behaviour, yes.

You should not necessarily be liable to provide accommodation for your wife, though you have a duty to ensure that your child has somewhere to live.

I hope that clarifies the additional points you have raised.

If you have further questions, you can always come back to me.

In the meantime, if you could take a second to provide a 5 star rating (at the top right of your screen), I'll be credited for my time spent responding to your question.

Kind regards,


Hello - I didn't hear from you.

If you have further questions, you can always come back to me - but bear in mind this is an email service and not live chat so you may not get an instant reply.

In the meantime, if you could take a second to provide a 5 star rating I'll be credited for my time spent responding to your question.

Kind regards,


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