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plclegal, Barrister
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 6594
Experience:  Barrister at law
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I need some advice about my child access agreemet, not yet

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I need some advice about my child access agreemet
JA: What steps have you taken? Have you filed any papers in family court?
Customer: not yet having mediation meeting tomorrow
JA: Family Court normally sits in a local County and Magistrates' Court. Do you know the location of the court? If not, what county do you live in?
Customer: I'm in the UK,
JA: Anything else you want the Lawyer to know before I connect you?
Customer: Yes so I am still living with my husband but we agreed to separate. The reason we cannot move forwrad as we cannot agree on access to my daughter. My husband wants 50/50 access and I don't believe that is in the best interests of my daughter. She is 2.5 years old and I am her primary attachment figure. While my husband has been involved she only wants me to put her to bed, wake her up and generally screams the house down when I have to leave her with my husband. It's pretty much always been like this....I know if she was older she would say she would want to live with me and have regular time with my husband. She is also possibly on the spectrum, investigations with health visitor are ongoing but she is very clingy. Also my husband has been aggressive to me in the past and I believe he is either on the spectrum or personality disordered like narcissistic and I worry about handing her over to him 3-4 days per week....

Hello, my name is ***** ***** I’ll do my best to assist you today.

Please bear in mind as this is an email service and not live chat I may not respond immediately.

I'm just reviewing your question.

OK. 50/50 care does not work in all cases. And it also require, in my experience, a good working relationship between parents.

If you don't think this is in your daughter's best interests, then stick to your guns.

There's no legal presumption that this should be in her best interests.

Just be clear about the reasons why, and focus on her needs in the arguments that you put forward to the mediator.

Can I clarify anything for you?

Customer: replied 6 months ago.
The problem is my husband is very controlling and will not back down over this and he is also a master manipulator and comes across very charismatic etc. Do you think it is worthwhile mentioning his past aggression or should it all be future focused? I just don't want the mediator to be won over by him....also is there anything in your opinion I should prepare? I have a plan of how I think the contact should look, which is basically what the schedule is now so would be an easier transition for my daughter......Also finally in your experience how often is 50/50 granted in court for a child as young as my daughter as I know it will come to that?

Just stick to your guns - if your proposal is reasonable then make it clear to the mediator that this is in the best interests of you child. Be prepared that this will go to court though - he won't back down I don't imagine.

Yes, his past aggression is something you can raise, but the court may not find it relevant to the child arrangements if you are separated and this does not pose a direct risk to your daughter.

50/50 is becoming more common than before, but it's still not the 'norm' - and each case is decided on an individual basis.

I hope this clarifies things?

If so, please take a second to rate my response with 5 stars as this will credit me for my time.

Thanks and do let me know if you have further questions, follow ups are part of the service, even if you have already taken the time to rate for me.

Kind regards,


plclegal and 5 other Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 6 months ago.