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james bruce
james bruce, Solicitor-Advocate
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 3776
Experience:  Owner at James Bruce Solicitors
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I was refused access until my son agrees he is ready then

Customer Question

i was refused access until my son agrees he is ready then the mother has to allow access. My son was 8 he is now almost 12 and mother is not co operative how do i proceed trying to change the order
JA: What steps have you taken? Have you filed any papers in family court?
Customer: not as of yet
JA: Family Court normally sits in a local County and Magistrates' Court. Do you know the location of the court? If not, what county do you live in?
Customer: yes london
JA: Anything else you want the Lawyer to know before I connect you?
Customer: no
Submitted: 14 days ago.
Category: Law
Expert:  james bruce replied 14 days ago.

Hello, I hope you are well. My name is***** am a solicitor advocate and I will be assisting you with your question today. I am very sorry to hear of the problem you are experiencing and I will do my best to help you with this matter.

Customer: replied 14 days ago.
Thank you
Customer: replied 14 days ago.
I had a court order in which it says something to the effect of. Your son will reach an age in which he will want to know his father. when this tie comes his mother must do what she can to put him in contact with you
Customer: replied 14 days ago.
my son was 8 at the time of this order and will son turn 12. i thought many things in the case were not quite right such as asking me to go on a domestic violence course which i disagreed with as i was not abusive as she said but did receive a caution on an occasion due to an argument 6 years prior. They also stated i would get a supervised visit after completing the course then changed their mind once i did finish the course. Also i felt their were many discrepency in what she said and my son had said.
Customer: replied 14 days ago.
to add to that before Cafcass had stopped access i had regular access to my son and i was the one who started proceedings then ended up with no access
Customer: replied 14 days ago.
my son also claimed i attacked her with a pole and when asked she said she could not remember which was not questioned which i found peculiar and in truth she was the person who attacked me with a pole
Customer: replied 14 days ago.
sorry for the disjointedness of these messages this is the first time i have seeked advice and i did ot expect to be heard so soon so im a bit over the place
Customer: replied 14 days ago.
In conclusion I have not seen my son in over 3 year
Mum is not very co operative and will not send me any photos
i was told by the court to send letters via email to him and have done so once or more every month since with no reply
I am unsure he receives letters
she gives very minimal or no update on him
she did not tell me when she decided to move him from his school and i only found out when i called his school for an update on how he is
Customer: replied 14 days ago.
a supervised visit was supposed to be arranged after successful completion of DAPP course and was not given after
Customer: replied 14 days ago.
she does not seem to want to work with me to try and establish a relationship with him
Customer: replied 14 days ago.
I would like to know the best way to proceed and where i stand
Expert:  james bruce replied 14 days ago.

Thank you for that additional information, that will be helpfull in allowing me to advise you today.

If the mother is not helping or assisting with contact but rather being obstructive etc, then you would need to make a new application to the court to amend and vary the existing curt order.

You would do this by applying to the court using the form C100.

Advice the mother that unless she stops being deliberately obstructive, then this will be the course of action that you will take.

Customer: replied 14 days ago.
in terms of stating they were going to arrange a supervised visit the going back on this, is this a regular occurrence
Customer: replied 14 days ago.
Also as i have never been abusive to my son and there has been no complaint about me regarding my son is it normal the court would not grant access and leave it to the child to decide when contact is best without assessing me around him
Expert:  james bruce replied 14 days ago.

The decisions are up to the individual judge. Leaving it to the child to be honest is the best way, the child cannot be forced to see you even if the court say otherwise, the child can simply refuse to see you that is their choice.