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Ask Dr. D. Love Your Own Question
Dr. D. Love
Dr. D. Love, Doctor
Category: Medical
Satisfied Customers: 19436
Experience:  Family Physician for 10 years; Hospital Medical Director for 10 years.
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I had with my wife 15 days ago, what i know from experience

Customer Question

I had anal sex with my wife 15 days ago, what i know from experience is that the anus should be massaged first and then 1 finger is inserted, then 2 fingers and then the penis and all this using lube, that was not the case with her, i inserted my penis straight away without anal massage, my penis is 8 inches long and girth is 6, and i got it half way in and moved back and forth a bit until she stopped me because she was feeling pain, arent anyses supposed to be extremely tight and hard for a penis to go in from the first time, she said it was her first time to have anal sex ever and i find that very hard to believe.
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Medical
Expert:  Dr. D. Love replied 4 years ago.
Thank you for using JustAnswer. I will be glad to assist you today, although this is a long explanation.

The "tightness" of the anus during anal sex is really more of a function of the ability of the recipient to relax than the anatomy of the anus. The anus is potentially able to relax and pass a stool that is large in diameter. Some people are better able to relax than others, but it is not because it is not as "tight" but that the person is better able to relax.

During anal sex, the girth of the penis is a greater issue than the length. Many people can only accept a certain length of a longer penis, but this is more dependent upon any curves in the rectum or lower colon. The anus, itself, is not very long, but it is the girth that may be difficult for someone to accept.

Ultimately, if the recipient has more experience in relaxing the anus, then it is easier to relax to accept the penis. Some people may have experience in relaxing the anus to pass a larger stool. Some people are also better at being able to relax in many different situations.

It certainly is true that most people (of either gender) have difficulty relaxing during their first experience receiving anal sex, so I can understand your concern. But there certainly are some people that are able to relax on their first experience. Consequently, it is not true that the experience that you describe is proof that she had previously received anal sex. Since it is not proof that she previously received anal sex, the only other information that you have to go by is what she is telling you, so this also boils down to whether you trust what your wife is telling you. If she is typically honest with you and you otherwise trust her, then this is not sufficient evidence that you should no longer trust her.

If you have any further questions or need clarification, please let me know.

Expert:  Dr. D. Love replied 4 years ago.
I notice that this question is still open, but I have not received any follow-up questions.

If you desire any further information, please let me know.

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