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Dr. Kaushik
Dr. Kaushik, Doctor
Category: Medical
Satisfied Customers: 4747
Experience:  Doctor ( General Medicine)
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Im a 27 year old who was diagnosed with unstable emotional

Customer Question

I'm a 27 year old who was diagnosed with unstable emotional personal disorder, I have been to two different psychiatrists that both diagnosed me with this, but I'm convinced I have bipolar as I have extreme phases of mania eg hearing voices music crying and sounds, frantic cleaning, not sleeping for 3 days in a row overactive mind spending money I dont have when I'm on a high and then I get depression where I won't leave the house I don't clean wash myself etc, I have two children they never get neglected even if I neglect myself, aged 10 and 2, recently my 10 year old has left home because I cannot deal with her behavior as she always puts me down and is very demanding and disobedient plus she cannot deal with my highs and lows, I would never hurt my children I love them very much but I was in a mentally abusive relationship for 9 years which I am not in anymore as I can't control my anger when it comes to adults, I haven't been completely honest with my psychiatrist as I already had social services involved before as I am known to be violent to memebers of the public and my ex but NEVER my children as they are the only reason I'm alive, I have history of self harming and suicide attemps, anyway my question is if I am honest with my psychiatrist and tell him that my anger and paranoia is so bad that I could quite easierly kill someone and hav hav tried to kill my ex before and when we used to argue I used to fantasize about it, I've tried to run him over, held his nose whilst he was sleeping and tried to electricute him whilst changing a light bulb, basically if social services took my children away especially my 2 year old I would kill myself no doubt about it, my question is if I tell them all thisvwhat will happen to me? Will I be admitted to a mental hospital and will my children be taken from me? I'm a good person at heart I know it doesn't sound like it but I just want to get better for my children I hate being sick and having mood swings at the drop of a hat, also does this sound like bioploar or bpd? please help
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Medical
Expert:  Dr. Kaushik replied 4 years ago.
Greetings !

Welcome to the site.

I am Dr. Kaushik and i have many years experience in dealing with psychiatric conditions.

Well if the symptoms that you have mentioned above are true to the core then i will say that you present a clinical picture of Bipolar Disorder with homicidal / suicidal / self harm tendencies and actions which will be enough reason for the psychiatrist and authorities to get you involuntary committed ( i.e sectioning )in an indoor psychiatry facility and start you on a more specific supervised treatment under direct monitoring and vigilance of a psychiatrist and mental health staff. Also if a person is considered to be bipolar along with violent streak and paranoia then the same person cannot be considered well suited to hold custody of children owing to the possibility of the underlying mental condition overpowering one's judgement and will and resulting in serious harm to children.

You see although you may feel that coming out with total truth about your symptoms in front of a psychiatrist may jeopardize and compromise your intimacy with your children in lieu of your supervised quarantined treatment until you are symptom free but if you closely look at this keeping in mind safety and security of your children as paramount concern then you shall realize that in the wake of a full blown manic episode with paranoia you will not remain a considerate and doting mother that you have always been but instead the underlying condition will get the better of you and compel you to do serious things which you will not do otherwise which can include harming self or children, so my humble request to you is that you come out with your true symptoms in front of your psychiatrist and get yourself appropriately managed with your condition getting controlled effectively so that there after you can take care of yourself and your children without any problem.

I hope this makes sense and i will urge you to see beyond small short term gains in terms of keeping your children close to you for the shear joy and gratification that like any other parent you get but kindly seriously consider that this comes at the cost of a possible risk for your children to face your manic episode where you will not remain what you are due to the influence of the underlying psychopathology and this may spiral out of control leading to untoward consequences.

Also i must mention here that Bipolar disorder is a very stubborn condition and it has a tendency to become more severe as time passes by specially if there is no medical intervention used so much so that it may lead to devastating consequences so all i want to convey here is that so far somehow you have managed to keep your underlying symptoms under control but this can spiral out of control any time if serious and specific intervention / treatment is not provided to you.

I hope this helps.

Wish you all the best.

Please kindly leave a Positive rating if you are satisfied with the answer.

If there is any further assistance needed please feel free to ask using the reply button.

Customer: replied 4 years ago.

I have been ill since the age of 8 and have learnt to deal with my illness well I just can't control my emotions and the psychiatrists say it's not biopolar bit I have not told them about my ex, my youngest daughter is very happy and very clingy to me, I never let her see me cry or anything, I know it sounds bad but when I have an episode of mania it isn't a threat to her, I don't feel I can be honest with my psychiatrist as I don't want my children taken away my youngest would be devastated, I only ever had this extreme rage towards my ex but he is gone now because of the children I had to put them 1st. So basically your saying if u tell my psychiatrist the truth they will put me in a mental hospital and take my kids away? Also I haven't self harmed in 3 years I think about it all the time when I'm low but I could and wouldn't do it around ny child she is my world and is very happy, this is why I'm scared because although my actions sound bad age is very protected from them

Expert:  Dr. Kaushik replied 4 years ago.
I empathize with you and i can feel your emotions regarding your children being a parent myself but i have to come up with an honest assessment of your predicament and voice my earnest opinion, now the final decision rests with your own judgement and will.

Yes you got it right that if you tell your psychiatrist about all the symptoms that you have mentioned above it is very likely that you will be asked to get admitted in a psychiatric hospital or facility to seek supervised treatment and yes if a person is confirmed to be having a condition like Bipolar disorder with paranoid ideation and ideas of harm to others as well as self then the children of such a person are taken away until the same person has been treated completely and is symptom free. You shall confirm this legal angle by discussing it with a lawyer.

I hope this helps. I have no intention to offend you in any way and if that has been the case i apologize to you but i need to be honest with you as a committed professional.

Wish you and your children all the best.

Customer: replied 4 years ago.

You havent offended me at all, I just know my children aren't in any danger from Me but that's what I'm scared of, also, why do you think my phyciatrist won't diagnose me with biopolar when I clearly have it? It's so frustrating, is it because I haven't told him everything? I've told him about voices mania and depression I even wrote it all down? He said spending money is a sign of bpd as is rapid and extreme mood swings? All I want is to get better he put me on quantipine (sorry about the spelling but it is to strong so I stopped taking it, I couldn't look after my daughter properly, plus I wanted to mention that I only got the homicdal thoughts with my ex, but if someone in the street looks at me when I'm angry it could turn nasty, I would never intentionally kill some1 but when I get angry I do lose all awareness of how much I'm hurting someone although again I haven't had a violent episode in public for 3 years

Expert:  Dr. Kaushik replied 4 years ago.
You see there is a psychiatric term related to Bipolar disorder called as Irritable mania where in there is abrupt anger outbursts with a more often than not underlying irritable mood often getting turned into anger and violent outbreaks in wake of a stressful stimulus. You may bring this up and discuss it with your psychiatrist and see how he responds to this.

I do not know how can two psychiatrists miss on your diagnosis because your symptoms are quite in sync with the diagnosis of Bipolar Disorder. Yes i agree that borderline personality disorder have some traits which mimic those of Bipolar disorder but in your case reckless spending sprees, constant irritability and incessant anger outbursts, homicidal and self harm thoughts, paranoid ideas and auditory hallucinations ( hearing voices) all of these are more compatible with the diagnosis of Bipolar disorder (mostly Irritable manic episodes alternating with depressive phases.

Also i will like to point out one thing and that is your psychiatrist had prescribed and placed you on an anti psychotic drug like quetiapine which is more suited to the diagnosis of bipolar disorder ( although it can be used in bipolar disorder but it is not considered as the first choice drug)while an anti depressant is the choice of drug for use in borderline personality disorder so this also evokes a sense of ambiguity in mind regarding your psychiatrist's assessment and judgement of your case as he has left some lacuna in his understanding of your condition but has otherwise tried to prescribe you on the lines of an underlying bipolar disorder.

Anyways if he had tried to prescribe you quetiapine then he shall not have any problem to prescribe abilify ( geenric name -- aripiprazole ) which is also an anti psychotic drug but with least side effects and far better tolerance from the body as compared to quetiapine and it will work against your abrupt temper outbursts, irritable mood and mood fluctuations and you are more likely to convince your psychiatrist to prescribe since he willingly has used a same class drug previously. Abilify will be effective at dose of 10-15 mg / day.

I hope this helps.

Wish you all the best.

Please kindly leave a Positive rating if you are satisfied with the answer.