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Dr. Chip
Dr. Chip, Board Certified Physician
Category: Medical
Satisfied Customers: 36085
Experience:  20 yrs. in practice, includinge surgery, general medicine, addiction medicine and pain.
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My 27 Year old daughter is completely apathetic about getting

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My 27 Year old daughter is completely apathetic about getting a job or advancing her future. She has a good degree in Victimology from a US university . A colleague says its classic passive aggressive behaviour. She was living in US with her Mother and came to join me back here in UK 6 months ago. Since then she has not got a job, is disinterested in working and just drifts around all day. She will go to sports training but will not develop any other interests in work or studying. She maybe punishing me for having her mother back in USA but that was a mutually agreeable separation. This has surprised all my family and friends. My new partner has given up on our relationship as my daughter is always hanging around.
I have tried speaking to her and am not paying for any extras. She lives with me rent free.
It up to her to try but its difficult getting her to drink from the water we lead her to. Any ideas
Hi.What does your daughter say when you talk to her about this?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Very little. She says no to my offer of seeing a therapist because she does not think she needs to. She just goes quiet when I speak to her. Very little emotion most times. I did her a hard time saying she was free loading on me, her aunts and family and apparently that brought her to tears but otherwise very little emotion. She has no real reason not to work temporarily her in UK as I disproved her excuse it would affect her Green Card. A cool blond ! She has no ambition or motivation . Her future difficult to guess. Will not offer up her vision of her future
I understand.
Let me ask you this--how exactly can I help you with this problem?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
is there a medical or Psych treatment or approach for passive aggressive behaviour ? `how do you move someone from apathetic to motivated
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
she has all the faculties and skills. Its getting her to use them or removing the block
Indeed there is and it's called cognitive behavioral therapy administered by a PhD psychologist.
The only problem is that she refuses to see a therapist.
I'd suggest that you tell her that if she continues to refuse you will cut her off entirely--no more rent free living
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Thanks. I will suggest CBT. Why Is CBT the best in these circumstances ? Just need to find a way for her try it. Kicking her has been floated. she does not believe I will and she might be right.
CBT helps with apathy/depression and the passive/agressive tendencies she has. It's called tough love--you need to stick to your guns and make her believe you will kick her out
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Thanks I will find a CBT therapist and tell her to go or else she's out
My pleasure--let me know how it goes and please remember to rate my service to you
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