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Eveningstargazer, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 155
Experience:  Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT)
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Eveningstargazer.Following on from our previous

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Hi Eveningstargazer.

Following on from our previous discussion about my recently ended relationship, i just wanted to ask about the nature of the honeymoon period/infatuation in a relationship. As I mentioned in my previous question, my ex would say things along the lines of "I feel as though I've met my soulmate", "I want to spend the rest of my life with you", "I might not have an aboriton if we get pregnant" etc.

I understand that during the infatation stage of a relaitonship it is possible to feel this way, without a deeper connection having been formed. Is this the case?

Furthermore, is 3 weeks of seperation, with the prospect of 3 years of seperation, and only seeing one another physically twice a month, along with the many distractions of university enough time for such infatuation/honeymoon feelings to wear off?

You are correct in your understanding of this phase of most relationships. When a relationship is in the early stages, people often become "head over heels" This play into your need for instant gratification and total consumption with our newest interest.
However, this stage usually begins to dissipate within a few months and the couple may even start to question whether or not they are "good" together. If both partners are able to have open and honest discussions, they are often able to get through this phase as simply a bump in the road. However, as we have discussed prior, this stage may have been extremely difficult for her to face, or even admit she was experiencing.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

And can one infatuation be more intense than another?

We were still very much in this phase until the establishment of distance between us so could this have encouraged questions about whether we could make it work over distance, whether it was worth it etc. despite all of the extreme statements mentioned above?

You are correct. Since the relationship had not yet established itself yet, distance sped up the process, and yes, one infatuation can absolutely be more intense than another. The key here is to understand that whenever a relationship is new, it needs to incubate, much like an egg, before it is strong enough to face things on it's own.
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