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Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1427
Experience:  Ph.D. Licensed Psychologist
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Please help,I have had a live in partner in my home

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Please help,I have had a live in partner in my home for 20 years although we have not had a relationship for 10 years. We have a daughter together who is now 28and has moved into her own flat about a year ago, every time i mentioned to her that i could not lput up with him any longer, she nearly had a breakdown so I let it go by although I made it clear to him that when she got stronger and could deal with our split he would move out.I am severely disabled and `am still expected to do his washing, cooking and cleaning after him. I am so depressed and tired and in constant pain, I do not need to be fetching and cleaning after him. He is in full time work a civil servant and 8 years my junior i am 66 years of age, living in my bedroom in my house just to avoid his verbal abuse and he refuses to leave. I am so tired .I just need some peace and to enjoy my own home after making a lovely home for 22 years and have worked hard on it while he has just sat for hours on his bottom and have had no help.Everytime i ask him to leave he just tells me to f off and for me to leave. I have asked him to leave by the end of August. but still thinks i am kidding. please help. what can i do. Mary
Hi Mary. I'm sorry he is doing this to you. Have you looked into any legal recourse with him ? As you are not married, he can be considered a trespasser in some locations. I'm not sure where you live and what the law is, but at this time, it seems as though you need to seek some legal, third party assistance to remove him from your home. Is his name on the deed or has he paid "rent" to you at all ?? You may have to prove his treatment of you as far as verbal abuse, etc.. You should not have to put up with the way he is treating you at all. My advice is to seek the help of police or legal council in your area to remove him. While your daughter and her reaction to your needs to remove him are of course of concern, you must look at your own well being. She is 28 and an adult. She needs to understand that regardless of her point of view, her mother is in pain and distress.Look to the law for your help. They can remove him from your home.
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