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TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3787
Experience:  Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Certified Professional Coach
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Me and my partner have been together over a year, it was very

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Me and my partner have been together over a year, it was very difficult at the beginning as I have been hurt before and wouldn't open up. When he finally got me to open up he no longer could stand being around me. He is very short with me and we are now looking to get help in order to save our relationship. Is there any advice you could offer to point in the direction of help?
I should also add he has self-diagnosed himself with depression, and I would have to agree with this.
Thanks for reaching out. I am sorry to hear of this pain for both of you but there is good news and that seems like you both have the desire to do some work to get back to truly caring. If he is suffering from depression then it could have an impact on how he is able to connect even if he desires to do so. I would start by having him have a visit with his doctor and ask for a therapist for him and then also one for the two of you to go together. I see you have tried to do things on your own but you can see that some outside support is needed. I think if you both can get this outside support and you desire to work on things then things may improve. Do you have a medical doctor to start with or please let me know where in the UK you are and I can do a search for you.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
He did go to the doctor about November last year but they put him on a waiting list and he has heard nothing since, I've encouraged him to follow it up but he lacks the motivation to do it as it's just another thing that has gone wrong.
We are currently at separate doctors but around the Manchester area.
Healthcare is different in the UK than it is here in the US. I would keep encouraging him to follow up and remind him gently that it is the first step to finding your way back to one another.
Take a look here and see about contacting them as a first step.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Thank you
And if he is suffering from depression then clearly motivation or lack of motivation could be a part of it. Take the time to sort it all out for yourself and to figure out what you desire and if it is to work on things then do all you can to get the extra support you need to make that happen.
TherapistJen and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Let me know how else I can support you.
Thank you for the positive rating. I wish you both happiness and good health.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Would therapy be a better option than medicine for depression? Research online said both would be ideal especially if there is a wait for therapy however I have heard it can be addictive.
That is a judgment call by the person or persons whom evaluate him. My rule of thumb is to be open to learning about it all and seeing what feels right.