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llw26, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 317
Experience:  LCPC - 2015. Counseling skills.
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I think my husband is in the middle of a mental breakdown.

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I think my husband is in the middle of a mental breakdown. He left the family home 3 months ago saying he was unhappy. We had our ups and downs following the birth of our 16 month old son.
His personality has changed overnight and he has become very hostile and threatening. He looks awful and filed for divorce less than 2 months after he'd left. He now has no money and lost his temper during mediation. He says that he'll never be happy. The last time I saw him he had lost weight and unshaven, eyes bloodshot. Can a mental break make someone leave their family and act this way? He is also ignoring some quite important things such as fines, car tax and mot.

Hello my name is ***** ***** I hope I can help!

Wow, it does sound like he's going through a lot. I am sorry to hear about this.

If someone is experiencing a mental breakdown, they may act in this way. Do you know where he's residing? Or if he still has his job? Is he speaking to any family or friends? If so, are they willing to help him see a medical professional?

Customer: replied 5 years ago.
Thanks for replying. He has rented a property and is still in work but is spending every waking hour there including the weekends he doesn't have my son. It seems that since he has started the divorce he wants to slow it down and is burying his head in the sand. He's very unrealistic about the repercussions. He's not a talker and has said he isn't discussing it with his parents although hey are aware we are divorcing and as far as I know he isn't taking to friends. He is very good at hiding feelings
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
My husband has a very responsible job and sees mental health problems as a weakness. I suffered with mild depression after the birth of our son and he wasn't really supportive of it

It is surprising he's been able to keep up at work - generally when people are having a mental break down, their work is also affected - along with problems with family/friends. It sounds like he is trying to avoid what he's thinking/feeling by diving into his work and literally not focusing on anything else - even responsibilities like payments and what not. Are you fearful that your son may be in danger when he's with his father? Do you have primary custody?

Customer: replied 5 years ago.
I do have custody but I'm not worried about his parenting ability although some of the activities suggested by him I has asked him not to do as they are not appropriate for my sons age e.g. Firework displays etc. He just seems to look worse every time I see him and continues to make rash decisions without thinking about the consequences

Okay, well that is good that you're not worried about his ability to maintain safety of your son. Because if you ever were, you may want to discuss that with your lawyer, as you may be able to put a clause in the divorce and/or parental agreement that he seek some type of mental health treatment.

Were there any other questions I can help you with today? If not, please provide a rating below based on the services provided. Thank you and best of luck!

Customer: replied 5 years ago.
Thanks, I'm just hoping he will wake up and realise what he is doing. In your experience do men change their minds during a divorce?

You're very welcome. In my experience I've only worked with individuals who are post-divorce - never anyone who was in the midst of one or was considering one. It is always possible that someone could change their mind (not sure the reasons behind the divorce, but if these things can be remediated... then there may be a chance); however, it sounds like your husband is very adamant about his thoughts and following through with the divorce. He may also realize when it's too late (and that's up to you to determine when that too late is).

Was there anything else I can help you with? If not, please provide a rating below based on the services provided. Thank you and best of luck!

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