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Hi there. How often is he masturbating and watching pornography?
Is there more to the relationship than sex? He seems to want to bail from the relationship and so I wonder if there is more concern then just issues with sex?
Well the first thing he needs to do is get evaluated by a doctor to see if something medically is wrong. I can see the anxiety and negativity playing in because he can't get an erection but we still don't know the cause. What typically happens is through years of masturbation and looking at porn, a guy actually causes his own erectile dysfunction. He would need to cease that activity in order to start repairing the damage that has been done.
Ok so if no medical reasons then he needs to get away from the pornography and masturbating and allow his penis to heal and for himself to be more sensitized to a real relationship. As he heals then the physical connection will return and hopefully his anticipatory anxiety will alleviate.