Hi, I hope I can offer some help with your question.
From the information you have provided, you feel as though your ptsd from a previous relationship is now impacting on your current relationship.
You have not said whether you have had any help to move through and begin to recover from the previous traumatic experiences. This would be the first step in helping you to regain the emotional balance and sense of safety. It sounds like you may be trying to ignore these feelings and push yourself forward in your current relationship, rather than provide yourself with the patience, compassion, freedom and empathy which will enable you to be true to yourself when you are feeling certain feelings, so that you can work through them positively.
A therapy that can be helpful for recovery from ptsd is an energy therapy recognised by the NHS as a complementary therapy called Thought Field Therapy. This utilises the same meridian system as is used i acupuncture but without the needles, instead you simply tap on the meridian points in a certain sequence while you are thinking about the discomfort or distress that may be triggering negative thoughts, feelings, emotions or responses.
It helps to rate you level of distress on a scale from 1 to 10 before and after using the therapy to note any shift in your feelings or responses. Used regularly, even daily or more, it can have a very beneficial impact on your ptsd.