Have Relationship Questions? Ask a Counsellor for Answers ASAP
Hello, I'm Rafael, an integrative psychotherapist. I'm here to support you. I'm reviewing your post now and I am sorry to know about your frustrating, painful, and concerning the situation. Please confirm your request for a private session by clicking the "Call me" button for the website to allow us to proceed with your consultation. Thank you.
Since I have not heard back from you, what I can tell you based on your post is that your decision to end this unhealthy relationship was not wrong but necessary. You have described a chronic pattern of neglect, manipulation, selfishness, passivity, and hurtful behavior, besides a consistent ability and unwillingness to truly take responsibility for his hurtful actions and to work on all the necessary changes.
Please consider psychotherapy as the best way to ensure you effectively work on this or any other psychoemotional aspect or life issue, especially when they are significantly impacted by distress and painful circumstances to ensure your own health, effective coping, and the best possible outcome. And when we develop any mental health problem, limitation, or disorder, we should not have to afford not having competent psychotherapeutic support right away.
You and your children should be your top priority, and that means that you should not fool yourself toleratignhis manipulation, nor the distorted belief pereptuatign this dysfunction woudlbe the best for your children, since that is never the case.