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JGM
JGM, Solicitor
Category: Scots Law
Satisfied Customers: 15899
Experience:  30 years as a practising solicitor.
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I’m 49 years old, For the last 8 years I have helped raise a

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Hi
My name is*****’m 49 years old, For the last 8 years I have helped raise a little girl with her mum, her father left when she was a baby, her mum and I have no family so we worked together. Every Sunday plus all holidays to date and various weekly pickups from nursery and school I have looked after this little girl.
The mum and I have now fallen out! I have not to see the girl anymore.
My Question: I am not her father so what age can the girl legally contact me without the mothers permission?
I have no family so the girl is also the sole beneficiary of my will.

Thanks. I am a solicitor in Scotland. Were you in a relationship with the mother?

Customer: replied 2 years ago.
from approximately 2000 to 2003, we separated the relationship amicably, then had a brother/sister type friendship as we both don’t have any family, she was on antidepressants and I felt responsible/caring for her welfare.
The mother (Jane) then married in 2009 to an Israeli man (Yaron). I got him a job and became friends with Yaron. Jane and Yaron had a baby together March 2010 (Maya). Then they separated in bad terms shortly after, Yaron went back to Israel devastated. Yaron has had little Skype contact since because Jane has been so disagreeable. I then helped Jane raise Maya only for the baby’s sake not due to any friendship. She is now no longer tolerable and we have now fallen out in bad terms.
I know I have no parental rights but Maya is like my own child.
I planned to take Maya to Israel to see her dad when she became a young adult. I now find myself in a position where I may not see her until she is a young adult also.
This is an emotional situation for Maya and me, not to mention the emotional scarring to Maya’s innocent mind. I just need to know at what age I can legally approach Maya directly or indirectly to explain why I am now away. I am not aloud to say goodbye to her.
Jane is not approachable and unfortunately has now become an even more disagreeable person. Jane has warned me not to contact her personally or via calls or text messages or she will report me to the authorities for harassment. I have agreed to this via text.
I contacted Maya’s ex childminder to ask her to say goodbye on my behalf but Jane has now split with Mayas childminder in bad terms also.
Just for my peace of mind can I approach Maya when she is 16 years old?
I can contact the father Yaron, my reluctance is only due to the fact his situation with Jane is worse than mine and contact will reopen his psychological wound of not seeing his daughter, I’ve not spoken with him for years because of this.
Unfortunately Jane cannot be reasoned with.
I don’t want to antagonise Jane or upset Maya but do I have any legal position?
Thanks,
Peter.

You may be able to apply for parental rights. Of that is successful then you could get a contact order. The alternative is to wait until Maya is 16 and that is a long way off so see a family lawyer and see if there is a sufficient connection to allow a parental rights order to be applied for or at least a threat of one which might influence the mother to reach some kind of agreement. She must realise that the relationship you have with Maya should be preserved even if the one with you is damaged.

Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Thankyou.

You’re welcome. Don’t forget to leave a positive rating so that I am credited for my time.

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