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Tim Brown
Tim Brown, GP
Category: Urology
Satisfied Customers: 4077
Experience:  GP in Sussex
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We have been married for 2 and a half years but we are

Customer Question

hey, we have been married for 2 and a half years but we are failing to have vaginal sex, can you help us?
JA: Is this your first time reaching out for information about this? In general, how would you describe your overall health?
Customer: we visited the ganaecologist last year and she told us try foreplay but nothing worked. we like to think we are healthy
JA: Thank you so much for your time. Finally, is there anything else in your medical history you think the Doctor should know?
Customer: no but while trying we used up to 4 fingers but it was incredibly painfull
Submitted: 9 days ago.
Category: Urology
Customer: replied 9 days ago.
Posted by JustAnswer at customer's request) Hello. I would like to request the following Expert Service(s) from you: Live Phone Call.
Customer: replied 9 days ago.
Let me know if you need more information, or send me the service offer(s) so we can proceed.
Expert:  Tim Brown replied 9 days ago.

Good afternoon, I am Dr Ruff, thank you for contacting us today

Expert:  Tim Brown replied 9 days ago.

I am sorry to hear this. Can I clarify what you mean by this?

Customer: replied 9 days ago.
hey, we have been married for 2 and a half years but we are failing to have vaginal sex, can you help us? The penis does not fit and sometimes the erection will go away before we even do anything
Expert:  Tim Brown replied 9 days ago.

Okay thanks. And your wife has been examined and all is okay?

Regarding not maintaining an erection, with foreplay is this not prolonged or is not possible?

Customer: replied 9 days ago.
the wife is now talking, yes i have been examined and everything is okay, with foreplay it is still not working
Expert:  Tim Brown replied 9 days ago.

Sorry, and have you tried lubricants?

Customer: replied 9 days ago.
no worries, yes we went through the nhs and we got the one that we have but it is not making any difference
Expert:  Tim Brown replied 9 days ago.

Okay, so if you have been examined and all is okay, lubricants do not work, the issue may be with your husband maintaining an erection to be able to perform vaginal intercourse.

Have they tried any medication to help with this such as Sildenafil/Viagra?

Unfortunately there is a huge risk that the psychological implications of this make maintaining an erection harder. Therefore they may not be anything structurally wrong. Using medication may help resolve the issue, and then I suspect one things are back to normal, the medication would no longer be required.

Customer: replied 9 days ago.
thank you so much. it is unfortunate that he does not want to admit that he could be the one with the problem. What can i do?
Expert:  Tim Brown replied 9 days ago.

So approach it this way, this doesn't suggest there is a problem, however with a recurring issue, the anticipation itself will be enough to lose an erection as this is what normally happens. You can buy viagra (Sildenafil) via an online pharmacy without seeing the GP if they are worried about this. It may be that all they need is a low amount like 25mg or 50mg, take it 1 hour before anticipated sex. The drug doesn't cause an erection on its own, and you still need stimulation, but certainly worth trying.

If it works, then you can then stop using it as the anticipation of failure would naturally resolve.

Customer: replied 9 days ago.
he is not willing to try any drugs but instead blaming me for the problem, what can i do?
Customer: replied 9 days ago.
thank you so much but unfortunately your way is not going to make the situation any better
Expert:  Tim Brown replied 9 days ago.

That is my pleasure, well I hope you find away to address it.